Archive for Conflict

Fired! Terminated! Let go! (We’re going a different direction…”)

by Grady King– Say it anyway you want, termination is always difficult, no matter which side of the desk you are on. When it comes to the termination of a minister, the ramifications are legion for him, his family, the leadership and the church. In recent weeks I have listened to the gut wrenching stories […]

Difficult Conversations

by Amanda Box –  This semester I’m team-teaching a Sunday morning class called Difficult Conversations. The goal with this class is to teach and practice basic conflict management skills to help negotiate differences and controversial topics. Being able to have productive conversations with believers and nonbelievers about critical subjects that connect with our deepest beliefs and […]

On Practicing Civility

by Grady King – Civility is in short supply: no aspect of life is unscathed from a lack of civility—social, political, economic, family, and certainly religious. Civil conversations are a rarity. Fear and anger is the air we breathe. The media and social media exacerbate the milieu of hostility.  When we do not strive for […]

Being Nice at What Price?

by Grady King –    We have all experienced it.  One person gets their way over the majority—a “few” people, predictably, control decisions. Group decision making is multi-faceted involving long-term relationships, history, precedent, threat and fear. When final decisions come down to one person’s influence, opinion or dominance repeatedly, frustration and fear tactics abound. The […]

The Post-Conflict Show

By Amanda Box – It was Saturday, with Sunday fast approaching. Due to travel and family emergencies, I was the last minister standing. Having several things to accomplish, while getting dressed, I texted my husband, Chuck, who was in the kitchen. “Can you take Hazel for ice cream or something so I can finish running […]

Church Leadership & Difficult People – When Being Nice is Not Enough

by Grady King – Charles Schultz is on one my favorite theologians. What he communicated through Charlie Brown, Snoopy and Lucy reached millions of peopl  “There’s nothing you need more than Christ.”  “Keep looking up…that’s the secret of life.” “Whatever is worrying you right now, forget about it.  Take a deep breath and trust in God.” For […]

When a Leader Falls into Sexual Sin

by Grady King –   I am sad, concerned and humbled. In recent months, five ministers I know have succumbed to some form of sexual sin. The sin is often a symptom of long lived and deep rooted issues.  From what I know, all but one has sought counsel and reconciliation with their spouse. They […]

The Indispensables of Courageous Leadership

by Grady King  –  Getting stuck as a church leader or as a leader group is frustrating and exhausting.  And no matter what we say to the church, they know we are stuck. They feel it, experience it and yearn for things to be different. Over time, a stuck leadership will drain the energy of a […]

Digging in the Dirt with Leaders & Churches Part III – Followship in a Consumer Culture

by Grady King People want leadership. People don’t want leadership.  As long as leaders are doing what I think they ought to do, I will follow. If not, I will be present to some degree, but not necessarily support or follow.[1] It’s certainly not God’s idea of leading or following. Churches are in need of […]

Digging in the Dirt with Leaders & Churches Part II – Healthy, Mature Leaders & Churches

By Grady King –  When a child throws a temper tantrum it’s obvious. When a parent chooses to appease the child to control the tantrum, the child is in charge. If the parent reacts, expresses anger, the child will push the button again. And the cycle continues. Without guidance, teaching and modeling of what is […]

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